Dudes Are Doomed (Part II): Sperm is Tanking

Part two of a seven part series.  View parts one, three, four and five.

This is part of an ongoing series on Sex and Science. Scientific knowledge is constantly changing, — particularly Genetics, which is in its infancy. Trust Your Perceptions makes an effort to present current knowledge. Women, consider entering Genetics. (This piece is speculative, and meant for mind-fliers who appreciate spectacular views).

Necrophilia Explained, or Trust Your Perception’s Unifying Theory
of Standard Male Bullshit


Dudesperm — and therefore Dudes — are Done-for

In addition to the over 97% loss of the Y chromosome, a second stunning circumstance is also hastening dudedoom: the Y’s package delivery system – sperm – is also failing. Infertility clinics “helping couples conceive” have — have you noticed? — popped-up everywhere in recent years. Yet these clinics primarily serve men — because most fertility problems are caused by defective sperm.


“Male infertility” usually means “sperm decay.” As the Y’s sperm-making genes become mutated – those paltry few genes Y still has get wrecked, — and sperm can’t “perform.” The sperm itself decays. (Other factors, such as pesticides, and possibly estrogen from birth control pills found in public water supplies (turning on the tap) are also implicated in sperm death).

Sperm counts between 1940 and 1990 dropped world-wide, according to researchers, by at least 50%. This is based on individual sperm “head counts.” Often these head counts included immobile, deformed, and Y-mutated sperm, ie, abnormal sperm. But including abnormal sperm in sperm head counts results in an erroneous number. One-third to half of sperm world-wide have been found to be abnormal. (Recent more-standardized counts have come up with abnormal sperm figures as high as 85%). Researchers are nervously standardizing count procedures now. Once procedures have been standardized world-wide, no longer including abnormal sperm in sperm counts might result in a global sperm decline figure almost as shocking as the near-total decline of the Y chromosome. Except — unlike the Y chromosome, sperm hasn’t taken a hundred thousand years to degenerate. – Sperm has degenerated in just a few generations.

One just-released regional study, eg, found that between 1989 and 2005, sperm counts of 35-year-old men in France dropped by 32.2%. Relying on the information above, if, between 1940 and 1990, sperm counts dropped world-wide by 50%, this would mean that since 1940 – in just 65 years – sperm counts for 35-year-old men in France may have dropped around 80%. — An 80% drop in sperm counts in just two or three generations.

In 1950, sperm counts measured at 100 million per ml, before dropping precipitously. Drops have been so serious that the World Health Organization (WHO) revised its recent “normal” sperm count threshold of 60 million per ml to 20 million per ml. Additionally, WHO is now considering further revising its “new normal” rates of 20 million per ml to 10 million per ml – cutting in half the already radically-revised number. (At 20 million per ml, male fertility becomes highly questionable. At 10 million per ml, sperm are more or less zombified). At this rate, production of viable sperm may become a much more immediate crisis than the nearly-dead Y.

Because: No sperm, — no dudebabies.


When dudes start talking all-mild-and-dull about “infertility,” pay attention.

In the labs of infertility clinics, sperm ability is tested by shooting the dudesperm in question at a hamster egg to see if it penetrates. (Rape + Target Practice. So totally Dudely!) Should the hamster egg (prove impenetrable? prevail? — this is so pathological, Trust can’t even find the word) – dudesperm clearly needs help, and a needle of this decayed wank product is then shot directly into the egg of the woman who wants to be a mother (in a dish under a microscope). Called ICSI, over 100,000 babies have been born this way. The problem with this trend in circumventing sperm failure is that, should the baby be a boy, dudebaby just inherited dad’s can’t-make-a-baby-without-a-clinic sperm. For this reason, many couples chose a girl in the dish to implant into the future mom.

It should be noted that mens’ selfishness in having “their” woman have “their” child, never mind the decrepitude of their sperm product, strews sewage into the gene pool. Evolution exists to filter out bullshit that’s not working. These poor-specimen men and their women-wives are paying to circumvent evolution, paying to pollute the gene pool. Sperm decayed to the point of needing a fertility clinic has been shown to result, for example, in female and male babies with neurological problems, nervous-system disorders and behavioral and learning difficulties. Disturbingly, it is the women-wives who have willingly abdicated their right to manage reproduction for the well-being of the species. As succinctly stated by writer Beata Murrell: “Reproduction is women’s responsibility.”


Dudes make sperm non-stop. In the Dudeball Factory, production runs 24/7, as it takes two months to make sperm. Sperm then spend another 10 days in the kiddie pool learning to swim (which, contrary to popular belief, they don’t do well and are getting worse at). These stages of production are slow, but sperm-making is dude’s biologically-mandated life-long job. Dude exists to be the end-of-the-hall sperm pop machine at the all-girls school.

But this isn’t fortunate for dude. — Because every time a male makes sperm, he incurs more and more mutations. — Every time a male incurs more and more mutations, he contributes to the demise of his Y and the Ys of his progeny. — Every time a male contributes to the demise of his Y and the Ys of his progeny, he is contributing to the demise of his sperm and the demise of his progeny’s sperm. — In other words, the more sperm a dude makes, the more dude is destroying his own sperm — and the sperm of his male descendants. Which brings us to this moment. Trust has a scientific announcement to make which is solely the work of Trust Your Perceptions: Porn is ACCELERATING dude demise. Dudes cuming in their hands to porn is exacerbating Total Male System Failure.

Between 1953, when Playdude first got dudes to wank in concert, to the present day, — a mere 60 years, — porn has, well, “skyrocketed” and “exponentially exploded” does not even suffice. Increased porn correlates over 60 years perfectly vertically parallel to increased wanking. (And Trust can’t help but notice, drop in sperm counts correlates downward).

Wanking, of course, seems like just wanking, but is in fact, an insanely unreasonable demand on the male, who is, afterall, not unlike the pop machine. You keep feeding that machine quarters and smacking that pop button, eventually — no pop. Sperm is expensive for dudes. An example some of you may be familiar with is ease with which dude slips, post-coital – INTO A COMA. — Checking, you may have discovered he’s not dead; he just LOOKS dead. The Tantricas were onto something when they warned men against ejaculating. Sperm wastes dudes. (Some male creatures, because sperm is so expensive to make, only make it once a year). The lifespan of hermaphroditic worms who go male for the sole purpose of sperm production is shortened by a quarter. Not only can sperm production shorten dudelife (is this why, despite every benefit conferred by patriarchy, men have shorter lifespans?), unreasonable sperm-production-demands contributes to sperm failure. Human males have no viable sperm left – ye old “shooting blanks” — after only 6 ejaculations within 24 hours.

When virtually all dudes on Earth masturbate in concert, at high-frequencies, as they are doing now with porn, the Y and sperm in all men get wrecked, while this wreckage gets passed down to all future dudebabies, who, like their fathers, wank on, working those wrecking ball levers themselves, wrecking the wreckage into dudedust.

For boys, pornjacking is suicide. Boys who pornjack are hereby decreed “Suicideboys.” In Suicideboys’ Global Pornjacking Extravaganza, — should a mutation take down the “male making” gene SRY, — this gene already now wounded from mutation strikes, — dudedust is NOW. (No more SRY means only girls get made). Male scientists from Japan to Macedonia were worried this had already happened with XO Turner’s Syndrome females, — but were relieved to learn not yet.

The condition Trust posits here can be referred to as “DEAD” — Dudedoom Enthusiastically-Accelerated through Dickwanking. Though clueless just how hurtful, funfems are accidentally correct: Pornography hurts men too.

Oh. — But there’s more. —

This “DEAD by porn” scientific announcement is hereby supplemented with a second scientific announcement, also solely the work of Trust Your Perceptions: Heat Immobilizes Sperm. Increased global temperatures will make dudesperm look like a bunch of shot-up nodding dopefiends crossing into overdose. With Global Warming, sperm may fail completely. And as we’ve seen: No sperm, — no dudebabies.

The reason dudesperm is made in dudeballs is because dudeballs are outside of dude’s body, — where it’s a couple of degrees cooler. If dudesperm were made in dude’s body, which would be smarter for avoiding mutations, dudesperm would nonetheless DIE from the extra couple degrees of warmth. (And what doesn’t die, can’t swim).

Heat makes sperm nod out so effectively that ball-warming is sometimes used as birth-control. A dude trying to bullshit you into hot tub sex by saying his sperm go to sleep after taking a bath, though definitely bullshitting you, isn’t lying. Scientists in India found that three weeks of daily dudebaths lulled dudesperm into a deep sleep for an average of six months. If dudesperm can’t handle three weeks of baths, dudesperm won’t be able to handle what’s coming. In fact, as we shall see, there are already signs that dudesperm can’t handle the warmth already here.

The second condition Trust posits here can be referred to as “STOP” — SpermatozoaC_67_article_2067511_body_articleblock_0_bodyimage Toasting on Planet.

Not only are men expediting their already-in-the-works-demise by committing Y- and sperm-suicide through pornjacking, but men are also expediting their already-in-the-works demise of sperm failure by not-giving-a-shit about the global warming they caused in the first place.

So this is how it is: The nearly-dead Y, skipping the hospital, is driving itself straight to the cemetery. To make matters unbelievably worse, the sports car Y is driving to personally deliver his own precious cargo has gone all-asudden-fucky, accelerating out-of-control, no brakes, crashing through the brick wall of the cemetery, and coming to a – you got it – DEAD STOP.

Now Fewer Babyboys

The male birthrate is slowly but surely dropping. — Worldwide. The women of the world just aren’t making as many.

Females are currently giving birth to 17 fewer males per 10,000 births. (If female infanticide in China, India and elsewhere was not taken into account in calculating these scientifically-accepted figures, — which is probable, — women are birthing even fewer males). Under normal conditions, females already spontaneously-abort (“miscarry”) more males than females. Hard times – economically, poli-psycho-dude-wise, environmentally — all bad news for dudebabies. Because then women make even fewer.

An increase in the unemployment rate, for example, causes an increase in the spontaneous abortion of males. The higher the unemployment rate, the higher the spontaneous abortion of males. A bad economy, which for most USians, eg, doesn’t usually mean life or death, still makes for fewer games of dice down by the gene pool – less biologic interest in producing males.

Male birthrates also drop after poli-psycho-dude incidents and environmental traumas. Well-documented examples include the London Great Smog in 1952, Jerusalem after the Six Day War in 1967, the political collapse of East Germany in 1991, the earthquake in Kobe, Japan in 1995, and the 2001 Twin Towers bombing in New York City. In the Kobe example, scientists found Y-sperm lost viability after the earthquake. In the New York example, scientists found pregnanting females spontaneously-aborted males, with this single dudes-are-insane incident resulting in a 5% drop in making New York City babyboys. The impact of 9/11 reached all the way to the West Coast, as male birthrates in California dropped 2%, — with girl rates holding steady. When environmental trauma does occur, the more serious the environmental trauma, the more seriously dudebabies stop being made. The Aamjiwnaang First Nation Reservation (in what is now Canada) is surrounded by petroleum and chemical plants. The air is the worst in Canada. The water is defiled by mercury and PCBs. An astonishing 40% of pregnanting Aamjiwnaang women spontaneously abort. Male birth rates have dropped so dramatically, the school hockey team has been disbanded because there are too few boys. But Aamjiwnaang boys, though few, are still being born. In Seveso, Italy, however, after a 1976 dioxin explosion — to those most exposed — no boys were born for seven years.

And now, with Global Warming, Earth enters a new phase. Initially, as temperatures rise, women may birthe more girls than boys. Girl-making is more likely in a slow-motion sperm situation. This is because while Y-chromosome-sperm can live three days, X-chromosome-sperm can live for five. Under warming conditions, odds in favor of girl-making increases. Women living in warmer climates already birthe fewer boys, probably because of heat’s stoner affect on Y-sperm. Scientists say they can’t explain the drop in male birth rates world-wide. But heat-stoned sperm alone would explain it.

We may now be seeing Global Warming’s initial impact on men. According to Trust Your Perception’s STOP Theory, because heat devastates sperm, because the sperm which survive heat devastation can’t swim well — as Global Warming continues, sperm may fail completely – meaning no more males would be made. But as we shall see in the Epilogue, however, no more sperm does not mean extinction.

Women of the world are rising. Women are becoming more literate, more educated, more self-sufficient, more conscious, more connected, more organized. Women in the west now earn the majority of degrees at every level. Women everywhere who are demanding equality with men may realize women and men aren’t equal. Women have about 1.5% more genes than men, — the same difference between women and female chimps, — or men and male chimps. Humans don’t have that many genes to begin with; plants have more genes than humans. An approximate 1.5% difference is major — major enough that it can result in an entirely different species. As the world’s women experience globalization, the world’s women will see, inevitably, that the main problem, everywhere – is men. The women of the world have untapped potential. And unlike men, who are gene-broke and sponging, — all of the women of the world are gene-rich.